Mothers of hormone-treated children: their loneliness, their pain

When resisting chemical and surgical 'therapies' and calling for a more cautious approach to daughters and sons with dysphoria, these parents find themselves against everyone: friends, schools, doctors, therapists, politicians, media and culture. On how many fronts can one fight alone? American psychiatrist Miriam Grossman, who treats the despair of these families, tells the story.
Please be aware that the translation of contents, although automatic, has a cost to Feminist Post but is provided to you without any charge. Please consider making a contribution via the "Support us" page if you intend to use our translation service intensively.
The contents of this site are translated using automatic translation systems without the intervention of professional translators.
Translations are provided for the sole purpose of facilitating reading by international visitors.
Share this article

Keira Bell, with its battle against the large London-based gender clinic Tavistock, has become the symbol of the thousands of young women mutilated and damaged for life because they do not conform to stereotypes of femininity. Today we tell you what happens to parents of little girls like Keira Bell through the words of a psychiatrist who has one of these mothers in her care.

Miriam Grossman is a child psychiatrist who has been working for decades on the problem of the sexualisation of children - of which 'gender transition' is one form - and publicly expresses her critical views on gender identity and the rest of the 'trans umbrella' (sex work, pornography, surrogacy, etc.). Although she specialises in children and adolescents, in a recent article she writes that is increasingly being contacted by a new type of patient: parents of so-called 'trans children'.

Grossman tells 'from the inside' what happens when your son - or, increasingly, your daughter - starts to say that he is 'trans', and what were the consequences of this? psychological consequences for one of his patients, the mother of a teenage FtM. Here is an extract from the article.

---------------------------------------

My patients [...] are shocked, overwhelmed, confused and anxious. They do not sleep and do not eat. Many have post-traumatic stress disorder.
[...]
After their teenager's bombshell announcement, most parents initially turn to therapists or gender clinics. The vast majority of these tell them that they must unconditionally accept the identity chosen by the child, use a new name e "helping Sara to bind her breasts and Michael to hide his genitals".

Parents objected, suggesting a slower process and deeper exploration. They insist: "We know our daughter (our son)! " Ideologists reject parents' instincts. They see their discomfort, but they brush it off.

For these therapists, the parents are the problem. Not the child's social anxiety, autism, irrational thinking or social media addiction. No, the problem is mum and dad's refusal to embrace the identity the teenager has been declaring for a fortnight and allow the child to lead the games.

The therapist communicates this assessment to the parents, sometimes in front of the child-o. By doing so, The gender identity 'specialist' is a heavy influence on a family in crisis, which has turned to him with hope and trust: he undermines the parents' authority and weakens the parent-child bond.

As if that were not enough, refers them, after a hasty and incomplete assessment, to an endocrinologist for puberty-blocking drugs. " They are safe and reversible"the therapist reassures the parents. "Your child needs it now. In fact, it's already late..

He speaks with authority and confidence: "These drugs now have the approval of professionals", he explains. "If you refuse them, the risk of losing your child to suicide increases.

The therapist foresees this risk for their child, or their child - the centre of their life, the dearest thing! The "professional" has only spent a short time with him or her, but knows what is best.

Parents return home, their emotions in turmoil. Some decide to trust the expert and rush to the endocrinologist's office, signing a consent form for the endocrinology tests. drugs that will impede physical, emotional, sexual and cognitive development of (their) teenager. Their child seems happy, they pray it will last.

Others immerse themselves in the search. Sooner or later they are surprised to learn the truth: if adolescents go through natural puberty there is a 60-90 per cent chance of 'desistance' (overcoming the idea of 'being born in the wrong body', i.e. 'being trans', Ed.). Changing names, pronouns and social presentation can lead to a fast drift and decrease the [percentage of] desistance. Once the child starts taking puberty blockers, desistance is very rare.

Blockers are controversial, have already been the subject of lawsuits, and their off-label use in healthy children is experimental (off-label use, i.e. use other than that for which the drug has been approved: in the case of puberty blockers, for example, the chemical castration of convicted sex offenders in some countries, Ed). There is a risk of suicide in adolescents who question their gender, but there is no evidence that this risk is lowered by transition.

Parents learn that the United Kingdom, Sweden and Finland closely examined the dangers of hormone treatment of minors and their ability to give informed consent for such treatment. As a result, these countries have made aU-turn in their policies: very young patients have to wait until the age of 18 for medical intervention. Similar concerns come from the New Zealand and theAustralia.

In conclusion: Parents who look beyond therapists and gender clinics find that there is a lively debate on how to help children like theirs.. "There is a consensus among experts, we are told. Are you kidding? There is no consensus whatsoever ! "

So the parents They seek a therapist who does not immediately affirm the new identity, but instead takes it slowly, to get to know their child and understand why the idea of having a new identity appeals to her so much. A therapist with a more cautious and nuanced approachparents do not want this. Another shock: there are hardly any.

Between psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers and counsellors, there are more than a million therapists in this country. I found a group of therapists who they practice long-term exploratory therapy for young people questioning gender, and there are only 60 members, many of them outside the United States.

My patient's experience "Cheryl', an example of a traumatised mother. Her 18-year-old autistic daughter, the only daughter, identifies as a man and has been taking testosterone for six months. Cheryl is convinced that she and her husband have been misled by a gender clinic and that 'Eva' has not had proper assessment and treatment. For the first time in her life, Cheryl is taking some psychotropic drugs for insomnia, anxiety and constant crying.

Cheryl feels she has everyone against her: Eva, family members, friends, schools, doctors, therapists, politicians, the media and culture. How many fronts can you fight on at once?

Doctors at Johns Hopkins Hospital tell Cheryl to embrace her daughter's 'evolving sense of self'. But when she first heard Eva's voice made lower by testosteroneCheryl threw up. Eva will make a double mastectomy, the date is already setThe thought floods her with panic and horror. She fears for her daughter's physical and emotional health, including her sexual health.

Cheryl also grieves for the grandchildren she will never have. But there is nothing to be done. Horror, fear, helplessness and pain are Cheryl's constant companions, except on days when she simply feels dizzy from the drugs.

Full article here

Translation by Maria Celeste


Much of the news published by Feminist Post you will not read elsewhere. That is why it is important to support us, even with a small contribution: Feminist Post is produced solely by the voluntary work of many people and has no funding.
If you think our work can be useful for your life, we will be grateful for even the smallest contribution.

You can give us your contribution by clicking here: Patreon - Feminist Post
You might also be interested in
22 May 2024
Germany: paedophiles in celebration. Fewer criminal risks for possession of child pornography
With a change in the law, the Bundestag decreases the penalties for possessing and/or distributing pornographic images of girls and boys, which have been downgraded to misdemeanours. News enthusiastically welcomed by paedophile groups pushing to lower the age of sexual consent to 12
Free paedophilia is also part of the transhuman umbrella: to progressively, preferably quickly, break down even this limit, to admit and even encourage transhuman sex - after all, girls and boys are at the heart of transhuman policies. A legislative innovation approved by the Bundestag takes a step in this direction. Geneviève Gluck tells us about it The German parliament voted by a majority to remove a section of the penal code that made the possession of child pornography a criminal offence. Once in force [...]
Read now
20 May 2024
Why Italy did not sign the EU declaration on LGBTIQ rights (it did sign another one though)
The declaration against homolesbobtransphobia signed in Europe by all the member states passed into silence. Great media clamour, on the other hand, over a second declaration not signed by Italy because it is strongly unbalanced on gender identity on the model of the Zan fu-ddl: here are all the critical points
A few days ago, on the occasion of the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia (IDAHOT) in Europe, the following resolution was passed unanimously - including Italy, therefore: 1498th Meeting of the Committee of Ministers (7 May 2024) - EU Statement ahead of the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia on 17 May 2007.05.2024 Press and information team of the Delegation to the COUNCIL OF EUROPE in StrasbourgI have the honour to speak on behalf of the European Union and its [...]
Read now
16 May 2024
UK: gender identity will no longer be discussed at school
A new crackdown by the Sunak government after the Cass report, which also warns of the risks of social transition of minors, the so-called 'alias identity' that has already been adopted by many Italian schools: in the classroom, it will no longer be taught that one can change sex and sex education will be calibrated according to age. And never without parental consent
After years and years of transactivists from associations such as Stonewall and Mermaids making the rounds with their sex education courses in English schools of all levels, Rishi Sunak's government announced today with Education Minister Gillian Keegan new mandatory guidelines for schoolchildren and students on these issues. Classrooms will no longer teach that you can change your gender identity, as has been the case until now [...]
Read now
14 May 2024
From Gaza to western delivery rooms, Judith Butler sees fascists everywhere
Fascists, of course, we gender-critical feminists too, 'allies of the right and the Vatican'. The Californian intellectual, renouncing all philosophical subtlety, compiles a political agenda that coincides with the platform of the university students in struggle. And he calls for an alliance between trans people, antifa, the pro-Pal movement, the homeless, black people, migrants and even women - understood as one of many minorities - to build 'a radical democracy inspired by the ideals of socialism'. An account of the Bologna leg of his triumphant European tour
Perhaps today one could speak of the 'Butler Agenda': its platform coincides perfectly with the platform of struggle of the-students throughout the West, with little certainty as to whether the chicken or the egg was born first. Certainly Judith Butler is to all intents and purposes the mother of Gender Theory to which these student(s) (a minority anyway) enthusiastically adhere; in turn these student(s) with their mobilisations are a source of inspiration for Butler, their platforms are also a [...]
Read now
12 May 2024
Not-Mother's Day
Natural motherhood is right-wing, biotech motherhood is left-wing because it is thought of as a right and not suffered as destiny: the diatribe on this issue between radical feminism and transfeminism could be summarised in this way. It's anything but new, but it has become radicalised. Not least because the context has changed so much: a baby boom is one thing, births at an all-time low is another
The other day Minister Eugenia Roccella was prevented from saying what she had to say, right or wrong, at the States General of Natality. The students who were protesting against her were allowed to express their demands - one of their delegates went on stage, and she also included Gaza in her speech, right or wrong - but this was evidently not enough because the minister was prevented from speaking anyway. Perhaps I am wrong, but if I were convinced of the [...]
Read now
6 May 2024
Trans surgery increases suicide risk
A very recent study of 90 million patients shows that trans-operated people run a 'significantly higher risk of suicide, death, self-harm and post-traumatic stress disorder' and require psychiatric support. Thus, the completion of the long and arduous transition with 'affirmative' surgery does not ensure the achievement of the hoped-for well-being
"Gender affirmation surgery is associated with a significantly higher risk of suicide, death, suicide/self-harm and post-traumatic stress disorder than control groups in this real-world database. Since suicide is one of the most common causes of death among adolescents and middle-aged individuals, it is clear that we must work to prevent these unfortunate outcomes. This further reinforces the need for comprehensive psychiatric care in the years following surgery for [...]
Read now
1 2 3 55