I see girls wondering why it is that some men, when they speak ill of themselves, use the feminine. Like 'what a fool I am' or 'I was a pig'.
This is exactly what I saw the Transfeminist demonstration on 8 March in Florence.
On the same 8 March in Madrid as in Paris, feminists demonstrating against the exploitation of prostitution were attacked.
In Florence a man dressed as a dog took the stage and told those present, speaking about himself in the masculine sense, that he is a woman because he chose to give his asswhich is better than being a worker.
Listening to it reminded me of a friend and gay colleague. towards the end of my pregnancy he He bought a dog, a beautiful boxer, which he decided to give the name I had chosen for my son.
I had always believed that he was pretending not to understand why it bothered me so much, but seeing the man dressed as a dog on stage I had an epiphany: for my friend the difference between bitch and woman was laughable and his buying a dog was my having a child; maybe he wanted to be me? Was the process of identification completed by assigning the same name? Who knows?
A similar mechanism was triggered in my stalker. Yes, at the time of my first pregnancy I also had a stalker, whose advances I had refused a year before and well... he took it badly. Until then he had 'limited' himself to masturbating at the window, ejaculating in my garden and hurling the worst insults at me. The reason I underestimated the problem was that he was a trans man: a person who at first glance could raise doubts about his gender, as he had female breasts on a male torso.
The moment my pregnancy became evident his anger increased. He waited for me to come out and follow me, once tripping me. Luckily I managed to move house before further escalation, but that's another story.
So the news of a pregnant woman being beaten up by a trans man over an argument about an occupied toilet in a train brought back old memories of patterns of behaviour already seen.
Our body amazes, frightens or disgusts those who do not have it. And for some, seeing a pregnant woman is a trigger.
I am reminded of the disgust with which some gay friends once spoke about menstruation, the fact that there were also lumps in the middle. I don't want them in the car, what if they stain the seat? What about the smell? They're disgusting, I don't know how it's possible to think of sticking it in that ugly thing.
I didn't wonder at the time how they, these male and gay friends, knew about the lumps or that it was 'ugly'. When and why had they, all of them, seen menstruation and fia?
Only recently I discovered that there is an all-male fetish about menstruationSome enter the toilets to look for abandoned tampons and reuse them. Others put on coloured suppositories and take laxatives to simulate the flow. Others 'give birth' to plastic babies.
However, on this occasion, while the gay friends said they were disgusted by the female body, the most ridiculous thing was that some of the women in the group nodded off, as if pretending not to have the same biology would protect them from the morbidity of those descriptions.
It is a delusion that they are better than the others, that this attitude, these discriminations only concern ugly women without red heels or stupid bellies or bad terfs. If they get male contempt, violent or not, they have asked for it.
Believing oneself to be safe from male violence is like deluding themselves that only straight men are affected by misogyny.
Believing that violence can be controlled, that it can be dosed, that it can only be used for certain purposes, has proved to be a bad choice all along and leads to selective blindness to the evidence that that same violence exists.
Much of the news published by Feminist Post you will not read elsewhere. That is why it is important to support us, even with a small contribution: Feminist Post is produced solely by the voluntary work of many people and has no funding. If you think our work can be useful for your life, we would be grateful for even the smallest contribution.
Please send to: BLU BRAMANTE CULTURAL ASSOCIATION
OBLIGATORY REASON: FEMINIST POST